Poop-a-thon

Don't read this if you don't want to hear about diarrhea. Lots and lots of diarrhea. Last night Brody informed me at 1 a.m. that he "hadda poop!" Ok, lets just say understatement of the year award goes to.......Brody Kowieski!
The kid had diarrhea like I've never seen. And trust me, Hank was on Miralax for the first 19 months of his life, so I've seen some bad ass diarrhea in my day. Not even Miralax could hold a candle to this poop.
He ran to the bathroom....but was about 20 seconds too late. It was on the floor, the heat vent, the walls, and the window blinds. Since I was about 20 seconds too late to see how he managed any of that, I just can't tell you how one gets poop on window blinds. But, he did. Now, when I say the floor, the heat vent, the walls, and the window, I don't mean just a little bit. I mean it looked like somebody took a cup of hot chocolate and threw it all over my bathroom. Bummer I don't have a pic to post huh? And, good luck drinking any hot chocolate in the next few days.
Ok, so he is panicking and I'm trying to help him without getting covered in poop spray. So, I get him cleaned up and had to break out my Mrs. Meyers cleaners and scrub my floor, heat vent, walls and blinds. And, just for added fun, I have bead board walls in my bathroom. Any idea what runny poop can do in all those crevices? I do. If you wanna know just ask me. It involved needing vinegar, dish soap, and an old toothbrush. All at 1:30 a.m. people.
And, of course the fun continued at 3 a.m, and 5 a.m. I finally feel asleep at 5:30ish. I brought Hank to school today in my yoga pants, no bra (thank you heavy down coat), yesterdays mascara on my face, and a crazy ass hairdo kind of resembling a side pony type thing. Now, this was no easy task people. Have you ever brought a kid to school and had him realize on the ride that his brother ISN'T going and he is? Brody told Hank he "has the diarrhea." Hank screamed "ahhhhh....I hate the diarrhea." And tried to get as far away from Brody as he could. Chill Hank. He's not a leper.